Half the man

So, you know all the funny things you hear in testimony meetings, a meeting format that allows anyone to say anything they want in front of the entire congregation, on the first Sunday of each month (just little explanation there for my non-Mormon friends- see this is a progressive, all accepting blog post, open and sensitive to every gentile, regardless of their lame, barbaric beliefs). But I digress…

Among other amusing things I hear, is this little furtive, often unintentional, self promoting nugget;

“I want to say thanks to my wife. I wouldn’t be half the man I am without her.”

Now think about this statement, or one of its many variations, for a moment. They are basically saying that they wouldn’t have ascended to their high and noble position in society, and obviously in the minds of everyone listening, without the stalwart efforts of their wife working behind the scenes. The great display of personality and achievement standing before us would never be “basked in” without the “little people” tirelessly, selflessly, laboring to chisel and hone the one speaking into the final product displayed before our eyes. Much like the condescending starlet accepting a gold statue for her acting prowess, humbly bumbling through a list all those that made her into the wonderful talent she has become. This false, or just slightly lame, modesty is in essence telling us all that behind every great man, there stands a woman. His wife is that woman. While, he (eyes unassumingly look downward) is that great man.

Unintentional, I'm sure... amusing nonetheless.

As for me, I like the more precise approach, saying:

“I wouldn’t be half the specimen I am today, without my wife’s efforts. And my kids, they make me probably 25% better than that even. That’s for each one, so once the whole family is considered, including the 18 months we had a pet, I’m a good 160% or so greater than I could have ever imagined before I started this whole family gig…”